Ode to Oats

In which this blog lives up to its name, for once.  Because, as you will see, I have some very strong feelings about what I eat for breakfast:

Hi my name is Katie and I love oatmeal.  I love it so much.  I can't live without it.  Some might call it an addiction.  An obsession.  I just call it friends with benefits.  I single-handedly keep the oat industry afloat and the oats, in turn, support a fiber-rich diet that keeps my heart and digestive system happy.  Everybody wins. 

I eschew all other breakfast foods in favor of oats.  Cereal?  Meh.  Pancakes?  That's cute.  French toast?  No thanks.  Omelet?  I'd rather not.  Oats, people.  It's gotta be oats.  I order oatmeal at diners.  I bring oatmeal camping.  I pack it in my suitcase so I can microwave it in a hotel.  Oh. My. God.  I can't live without oats.  If it were socially acceptable to strap a feedbag to my face, and fill it with oatmeal, I don't even know...I wouldn't not do it, that's all I'm saying.

"Cheerios?  F that S!  STEEL CUT OATMEAL!"  (source)

[If you don't get the bastardized Blue Velvet reference above, we can't be friends anymore until you watch the movie.  If you at least watch this clip, we can talk.]

This oat mania is out of control.  I cannot be satisfied by merely one kind of oats.  I am in a polyamorous relationship with all forms of oats, but I do have my favorites.  Most of the time, I divide my affections more or less equally between old fashioned oats and steel cut oats.  It keeps the spark alive (not that we need any help, thankyouverymuch).  You know what else spices things up?  Literally?  Spices.  You seriously have not lived until you've liberally dusted your oatmeal with cinnamon and ginger.  Mouth heaven. 

Because it's February and you all deserve to feel as much love as I feel right now, I'm going to share some of my favorite oatmeal concoctions.  Maybe you'll be inspired to find your soulmate in a steaming hot bowl of creamy love porridge, too.  Or, you know, you could be less weird and just eat some oatmeal sometimes because it tastes good and is good for you.  Also, it's so cheap!  Who doesn't want to get on board with that?!

So I'll quit my BS'ing and just show you some kinda blurry Instagram pictures of my favorite ways to eat oats.  Let me just preface by saying that regardless of the type of oats or the kind of fruit you add, no bowl of oatmeal would be complete (in my world, anyway) without walnuts, raisins and/or dried cranberries, cinnamon, ginger, and almond milk.  You can use regular milk, too, but I'm on an almond milk kick right now and I'm pretty happy about it. 

To round out your breakfast, you obviously also will need a strong, hot cup of coffee (also with almond milk or your milk-type beverage of choice if you're into that sort of thing), orange juice, a multi-vitamin, and half a grapefruit.  If you're OCD like me, you may come to realize that you HAVE to have this for breakfast or you will go through your day feeling like something is terribly amiss.  You will cycle through the list of things you could possibly have forgotten that morning, like underwear, or deodorant, or brushing your teeth.  But your completely irrational concerns will all boil down to breakfast.  It's the only thing that really matters, and, let's be honest, some days (most days...okay, every day) it's the most enticing reason to get out of bed.

Don't be jealous of anything you see in this picture.  I know it's hard not to wish you were eating this, the ideal breakfast, and drinking your coffee from this fantastic American Gothic mug.  (thanks Beth, if you ever read this!)

A few very important ingredients:  Steel cut oats, cinnamon, ginger, dried cranberries, raisins, and walnuts.  Don't judge my giant cinnamon.  I use a lot.  I have a problem.

Old fashioned oats with walnuts, raisins, and peaches!

Not to climb back up onto my oatmeal soap box again, or anything, but I feel like oats get a bad rap as being bland and punishing, or taking too long to cook.  Not true!  All they need is a little love.  Old fashioned oats cook in the microwave in less than 3 minutes, even with the extra few seconds of cooking time you need when you add frozen fruit (I keep bags of frozen berries and other fruit in the freezer at all times).  Just don't buy the quick-cooking oats or those awful packets of pre-flavored, heavily sugared oats.  Unless you like eating wallpaper paste or (wallpaper paste that tastes like cavities and hypertension). 

And don't add sugar to your oats!  That's what the raisins and fruit are for!  Natural sweetness!  Oats are good for you, processed table sugar is not.  Adding sugar to your oatmeal would be like washing your hands and then drying them on a pair of dirty underwear - gross, wrong, unnecessary, and defeating of the original purpose.  No?  Weird extreme metaphor?  Sorry.  I have a lot of feelings. 

The classic:  Oatmeal with blueberries, raisins, and walnuts.

The breakfast in the above picture actually contains cold, leftover steel cut oats.  On Sundays, I like to make a big pot and refrigerate the leftovers.  Usually I dish some out into a bowl and nuke it, but lately I've been in the mood to eat it cold, which is just as good!  Anyone who complains about the time commitment that oats require should try this, since the preparation time goes down to about 15 seconds if you want to eat it cold.

Frozen strawberries and cold, leftover steel cut oats. 

Nothing like eating a pile of cold and/or frozen things on a frosty winter morning.  I planned to microwave these strawberries for a few seconds before I put the oats in my bowl, but this was pre-coffee so I forgot about 2 seconds after I told myself I was going to do that.  Instead, I ate the whole thing cold, and it was delicious.  Almost like ice cream.  Oh god.  Is it morning yet? 

Old fashioned oats with banana slices, raisins, and walnuts.  

If you're wondering what to do with your last two brown, slightly mushy bananas, and you're too lazy to make banana bread (and you are too lazy), here you go. 

Saving the best for last:  Freshly cooked steel cut oats with diced apples, walnuts, and raisins

This.  This is the closest I will ever get to heaven.  It's like eating pie that is actually good for you.  That's all I will say, and I'll leave you with this:

EAT