Local Man Climbs Mountain, Takes Celebratory Scheistbrau - A photoessay

Andy didn't like my post about his friend.  He said it was "mean" and he "felt bad."  Yea, well think of all those people who got serial killed.  I "feel bad" for them.  Just for the record, that post was all me.  I am the one who is mean and judgmental.

To make up for it, I'm going to write about how Andy is Awesome and does Manly Things.  I think this is a story best told with a combination of words and images.

One day, Andy saw a mountain so big, it touched his soul.  That mountain was Mount Rainier.  He solemnly vowed, "One day I am going to kick that mountain's ass."

Mount Rainier did not take kindly to this threat.  When it heard that Andy was approaching the summit, it sucked all the oxygen out of the air and made Andy feel drunk.

Andy made it back to earth unharmed, and shook his fist at Rainier.  "You'll rue the day, Rainier!  I'll conquer you so hard, just wait."  Then he set his sights on a lesser peak he knew he could spank, in order to reassert his manliness.

 Andy could hardly wait for his trip to Mount Adams.  To stay in shape and also to distract his impatient brain, he spent the intervening weeks eating peanuts in the shell and trolling the m4m craigslist personals on his laptop.

Andy's dutiful wife spent the intervening weeks cleaning up after him.

The big day finally arrived, and Andy set out to summit Mount Adams.  He whipped it soundly, and insulted its mother for good measure.

 
Andy slid down the mountain on his butt, just because he could.  

He reached the bottom of the mountain and raced home to tell his hot wife all about his exploits.  But first, he REQUIRED a beer.  He grabbed a Pabst, but before he could fully savor its glory, he experienced a dire urge. 

And that is how Andy learned that the circle of life is real, and it moves us all.